Extremely Secret Diary--Madame Hooch (lego_hooch) wrote,
Extremely Secret Diary--Madame Hooch
lego_hooch

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City Lights, City Nights

It's nice being back in London. It reminds me of the wonderful days of my misspent youth. But that might just be Remus. After all, he was the one who turned me into the Wicked Witch that I am. He introdiced me to James. Who introduced me to sex, and all its dirty little facets. My very first Dom! He made me do such naughty things with and for and to his friends.

::sigh::

I miss those days.

The train ride down from Hogwarts was fairly uneventful. I managed to read through the rest of sirius's envelope to me. Pages and pages of limericks:

A Hogwarts Professor named Hooch
Found a lonely, bedraggled old pooch
She thought he was hot
With his big fucking knot
And tempted him to "hoochy-kooch"

It turned out the dog really was Black
Who begged her not to send him back
Soon the escaped felon
Was screamin' and yellin'
And pounding away at her crack.

And when it was over and done,
Said the witch to the dog "That was fun."
Said the dog to the witch
"Oh, on your knees bitch,
I tell you I've barely begun!"

He fucked her a couple times more,
In the bed, in the bath, on the floor.
Her expertise shone
When she gnawed on his bone,
Leaving him howling for more.

And when they became too sore to shag,
Their bodies as limp as dishrags,
They collapsed on the bed,
Slept the sleep of the dead,
Except for a tell-tale tail wag.

There once was an animagus
Who thought foreplay required a cuss
He met with a witch
Who said "I'm your bitch"
And now he's a dog with a puss!

A hairy black dog name of Snuffles,
Was rooting as if seeking truffles,
What he found was a snitch ,
‘Tween the legs of a witch,
And now he sniffs only in muffles.

A bitch who roams Hogsmeade’s street,
Likes to bang every time that we meet,
With me in dog form,
We give doggie porn,
To every witch, wizard indiscreet.

On a day that was stifling and hot,
I felt a great pull at my knot,
When watching two kids,
Audition porn vids,
And make Lupin much coin by the lot!

My days as a dog were quite numbered,
When I found a young witch to be plundered,
She likes it quite rough,
And I’m never enough,
She even bestiality wondered.

We explored many places to fuck,
And eagerly my cock she did suck,
Using her teeth,
As I moved underneath,
And wonder with joy at my luck.

I guess I admit I’m quite shallow,
But I do like it when she does swallow,
The wad that I blow,
When she sucks my dick slow,
And the amazing deep throat that does follow.

Even better a fuck up the ass,
It’s a chance that’s too good not to pass,
Like a virgin’s tight twat,
That many men sought,
Recreates the first time with the lass.

Sometimes she does beg for the dog,
It’s the knot half way up my thick log,
Come up from behind,
We do the hip grind,
And later I lap up her grog.

I spent many a night in a jail,
12 years all alone with no bail,
Now I’m out for some fun,
With my loaded gun,
And enjoy all the witches who wail.

A good rub of my cock between tits,
Blows my mind and I quite lose my wits,
And my cock she does suck,
In a great double fuck,
Then my rod in her face up and spits.

I hear that she takes it all ways,
And has had herself many good lays,
She’s horny and tough,
Likes canine rough,
And never does cease to amaze.

I get to explore with my nose,
As a dog until it all grows,
I lick and I nibble,
And hear the bitch wibble,
And then I go for curled toes.

There’s one witch who’s heavy with cream,
As I fuck her she lets out a scream,
She makes me want more,
Until we’re both sore,
And gives me much reason to dream.

My cock at attention will stand,
To the witch who has the right hand,
Or the teeth or the lips,
Which along my shaft nips,
For my pleasure, I admit ‘tis quite grand.

Of course there’s the witch’s full lips,
Wrapped around my hard cock as she sips,
From my dick bitter cum,
But saves herself some,
For her cunt in which my shaft dips.


I was laughing so hard my stomach hurt. Poor Remus, when he met me at the station and saw the tear tracks on my face, he thought there was something wrong. I tried to explain, but couldn't catch my breath. Every time I thought about it I just started laughing again. I finally just handed him the envelope & told him it was from Sirius. He glanced over it before tucking it into his pocket with a grin.

Then he helped me collect my luggage and we headed back to his flat.

He read the limericks while I was settling into his spare room. And apparently, he found one I had missed somehow:

A doggie, Sirius by name,
Tries out an exciting new game.
To the wolf he will play,
All sunny day,
And thus avoid all of the blame.


We wondered about that one for a bit. Remus is the only wolf he could have been meaning. Had he planned to come here for a visit before he died? It was very curious.

Anyway, Remus was gracious enough to spend the last few days playing Tour Guide and showing me around the city. So much has changed since I was here last. And yet, there is much that's the same.

Tomorrow we have plans to take in a show, but remus won't tell me which one. All he would say was that I had to dress elegantly.

You know... I'd forgotten how disappointing it was to learn that Remus wasn't the least bit interested in me physically. If he's half as good a lover as he is a date, I'd be in danger of swooning.

Ah. Dinner's ready.
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